151. Standing up for herself

 

Thousand Full Moon: shrimati Shakuntala Joshi (86+)

Contributed by: Varsha Dandekar

Here Shrimati Shakuntla Joshi reminisces about her rich and fulfilling life and narrates a few landmark events to Varsha Dandekar, her sister in law, who has kindly written it down to be shared here on the blog. Here is a brief summary of her narration in English.

Shakuntala, a native of Mumbai, is a retired schoolteacher with a fulfilling career of 35 years. Born in 1935, she grew up in a happy household with three brothers and four sisters. Her father worked for the Indian Railways. After marriage, she became an integral part of her husband’s family. Her sisters in law became close to her over time, would frequently visit her, and even lived with her as needed. Now she lives with her younger son, daughter in law, and her grandson. She expresses her gratitude for having a loving and caring family, especially her younger son, and attributes her happy old age to the love and caring, she receives from him.

When she was 11 or 12 years old, she remembers taking their family bicycle for a spin in the late afternoon without getting permission from her parents. She barely knew how to a ride a bike and was practicing in a back alley when she saw a milkman coming her way with several milk canisters balanced on his bike. She tried her best to avoid him but to no avail. She collided with the milkman and all his milk spilled in the street. She was afraid she would get a scolding from her father for taking the bike without his permission but no such thing happened as the milkman did not pursue the matter further.

She remembers an incidence from when she was about 15 years old. After finishing her matriculation, she used to go for a class with four or five of her friends. A man would follow the girls and would harass them by bumping into them intentionally. One day Shakuntala confronted him with her sandal in her hand ready to hit him and told him that she would call the cops on him if he did not behave. She was happy to see that the girls’ harassment stopped after that.

She narrates the unfortunate saga of her first marriage where she, an 18 year old city girl, got married to a man from a rural area without a full vetting out process. After other serious issues about him became known, she left him and returned to her parents’ house. She subsequently obtained a divorce with the support she received from her parents.

She remarried at the age of 24 and speaks highly of her second husband. Marrying a divorcee back in those days was rare. She credits her husband’s progressive thinking and vast intellect for accepting her whole-heartedly despite opposition from his older brother. He never mentioning her first marriage ever again. She remembers her second marriage that took place in the registrar’s office in the presence of both sets of parents. She says that both her sons are progressive in thought and followed in their parents foot steps by choosing a court marriage over a traditional one.

We thank and admire Shakuntala’s willingness and courage to share her story and hope it will be an inspiration for young women to standup for themselves in the face of adversities.

We wish Shakuntala the very best in her journey ahead.