151. Standing up for herself

 

Thousand Full Moon: shrimati Shakuntala Joshi (86+)

Contributed by: Varsha Dandekar

Here Shrimati Shakuntla Joshi reminisces about her rich and fulfilling life and narrates a few landmark events to Varsha Dandekar, her sister in law, who has kindly written it down to be shared here on the blog. Here is a brief summary of her narration in English.

Shakuntala, a native of Mumbai, is a retired schoolteacher with a fulfilling career of 35 years. Born in 1935, she grew up in a happy household with three brothers and four sisters. Her father worked for the Indian Railways. After marriage, she became an integral part of her husband’s family. Her sisters in law became close to her over time, would frequently visit her, and even lived with her as needed. Now she lives with her younger son, daughter in law, and her grandson. She expresses her gratitude for having a loving and caring family, especially her younger son, and attributes her happy old age to the love and caring, she receives from him.

When she was 11 or 12 years old, she remembers taking their family bicycle for a spin in the late afternoon without getting permission from her parents. She barely knew how to a ride a bike and was practicing in a back alley when she saw a milkman coming her way with several milk canisters balanced on his bike. She tried her best to avoid him but to no avail. She collided with the milkman and all his milk spilled in the street. She was afraid she would get a scolding from her father for taking the bike without his permission but no such thing happened as the milkman did not pursue the matter further.

She remembers an incidence from when she was about 15 years old. After finishing her matriculation, she used to go for a class with four or five of her friends. A man would follow the girls and would harass them by bumping into them intentionally. One day Shakuntala confronted him with her sandal in her hand ready to hit him and told him that she would call the cops on him if he did not behave. She was happy to see that the girls’ harassment stopped after that.

She narrates the unfortunate saga of her first marriage where she, an 18 year old city girl, got married to a man from a rural area without a full vetting out process. After other serious issues about him became known, she left him and returned to her parents’ house. She subsequently obtained a divorce with the support she received from her parents.

She remarried at the age of 24 and speaks highly of her second husband. Marrying a divorcee back in those days was rare. She credits her husband’s progressive thinking and vast intellect for accepting her whole-heartedly despite opposition from his older brother. He never mentioning her first marriage ever again. She remembers her second marriage that took place in the registrar’s office in the presence of both sets of parents. She says that both her sons are progressive in thought and followed in their parents foot steps by choosing a court marriage over a traditional one.

We thank and admire Shakuntala’s willingness and courage to share her story and hope it will be an inspiration for young women to standup for themselves in the face of adversities.

We wish Shakuntala the very best in her journey ahead.

 

150. Growing up with good values (sanskaars)

 

Thousand full moon: Shrimati, Nirmala Dattatray Mainkar, 94+

Contributed by: Ajita Athley

Nirmala Mainkar, née Ambu Ganesh Kher was born in 1926 in a village near Ratnagiri, Maharashtra, India. She comes from a progressive family and was raised in an environment of patriotism and selfless service. She credits her good upbringing to the good sanskaars (value inculcation) she received in her childhood. In her written and video narration, she recounts the open and free environment in her father’s house. During those times, girls were required to follow different and more restrictive rules as compared to boys. However, Nirmala says her upbringing was not restrictive at all. She would play freely among other children and received good education. She fondly remembers her bicycle her father had bought for her and the badminton court he specially got drawn for the children. She went to college upon her father’s insistence.

She mentions stalwarts like Bal Gangadhar Tilak, a great thinker, writer, and a freedom fighter and Dhodopant Karve, a social activist and a proponent of women’s education. She specially recounts the honoring ceremony of Vinayak Damodar Savarkar--an esteemed freedom fighter that took place at her father’s house, after Veer Savarkar’s house arrest imposed by the British rule was lifted.

Nirmala is happy where her life has brought her and is content with the wellbeing of her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.

We wish Nirmala continued peace and joy on her journey ahead!

 

 

149. A life journey of educating self and others

 

Thousand Full Moon: Shrimati Vibhavari (Akka) Gopal Gokhale (81+)

Contributed by: Varsha Dandekar

Octogenarian Shrimati Vibhavari Gopal Gokhale, Akka, as she is called by most, is an avid learner. She has pursued her passions and interests all through her life. She is humble, helpful and has a myriad of accomplishments to her credit. She believes in using her knowledge and skills to help others.

Akka hails from a large family from Khed, Maharashtra. She is one of the 12 siblings. Her father was a Hindu priest and mother was a hardworking gentle soul devoted to the family's well being.  She remembers her mother fondly and is grateful for the care she received from her mother which helped Akka recover from a long illness.

We present below the narrative of Varsha Dandekar’s interview with Akka (Thanks, Varsha Dandekar!). The interview is in Marathi, Akka’s mother tongue. We also include three short video clips where Akka narrates her experiences about i) meeting Late Shri. Sudhir Phadke, the famous Marathi singer ii) about joining a ladies Bhajan, a devotional song group and becoming their compere and iii) volunteering at the Palkar Cancer institute and helping with the fundraising and offering companionship to patients.

 

                                                  Devotion to Lord Rama and meeting with Shri. Sudhir Phadke

Volunteering at Nana Palkar Samiti (NGO) that works to helps Cancer patients

 

                                                            Joining ladies' Bhajan Group

Here we give a bullet point summary of Akka’s narrative for the benefit of those who do not know Marathi.

• She learned to swim from her brother when she was in school. When she would complain about the frogs in water he would tell her that frogs were clean and that she could not use that as an excuse to get out of learning to swim. She used her swimming skills later on to teach swimming to women in the U.S. when she was visiting her son.
• She got married when she was 17 and in the 9^th grade. Her in-laws supported her continued schooling. However, she could not go very far due to the eminent motherhood that followed. However, she persisted after her family responsibilities were completed and earned her bachelor’s degree at the age of 55!
• She learned yoga on her own and teaches yoga to children in the slums of Mumbai.
• She learned to knit and crochet and knitted sweaters for her family.
• She learned to sing Geet-Ramayan (program of devotional songs about Lord Ram’s life story) and became part of a group that was invited to perform at several places in Mumbai.
• She learned to do Kirtan (a folk performing art form used to spread spiritual/social message) and performed two memorable Kirtans at family functions.
• She raises funds for Nana Palkar Samiti an NGO that works to help cancer patients to offset their treatment costs.
• She is a compere for a women’s devotional song group where she shares informative forwards from digital media with other grandmother for them to share with their grandchildren.
• She helps her daughter-in-law with her catering business.
•  Last but not the least, she has learned to use the modern digital gadgets and uses them to stay connected with the world.

We wish Akka good health and peace in her journey ahead!!